Friday, October 10, 2014

Keeping My Sanity!

Early morning light shines through my Eastern facing window. 

Toddler giggles ring through the hallway as baby brother foot steps race after Bear. 

I come downstairs to either a huge hug, kiss, smile and "good morning" or "no, go back upstairs" depending on the day. 

Dad-Boss and Mom-Boss leave for work usually with two happy toddlers waving good-bye to them. 

And my work day begins!

Playing games, destroying Duplo towers, being a human jungle gym, puzzles, books, cars, trucks, and crayons! Diapers, snacks, drinks, lunch, nap times, brotherly fights, biting, kicking, screaming, crying, hugging, apologizing, lots of Bug kisses - all make up my day. 

Every Day!

Because I am a Live-In - it is literally Every. Single. Day. 

Don't get me wrong, I love it (most days). I love my job, I love the boys, I love the family I nanny for! I truly would not change my life at this point in time. 

Yet I wonder how I keep my sanity sometimes. 

Here is the reality: as much as I love kids, these two precious boys in particular - they aren't my kids. I don't have that parent bond with them. There is no inner sense of motherly grace or parental need to love them in me. Days comes where I don't want to come down stairs, days I want to throw the covers over my head and forfeit the day. 

Today was one of those days. 

Then I here a "bleep, bleep" of a Voxer message (an amazing phone app), open my phone to a text message, or a missed call from a friend or family member. 

And I remember how I keep my sanity - staying connected to people that love me. 
People like my brother who makes an effort to call me once a week and have a meaningful conversation about what is going on in life. 
April who will Voxer me until I return her message - and not just a 30 second message, a 15 minute wonderfully worded dialogue. 
Cindy who will shoot me a quick text asking about something we talked about two weeks ago. 
my Mom-Boss who checks in with me after a long week to see how I am doing. 
a random friend who sends me "just because flowers". 

This week in particular I learned the power of staying connected to people who care about me. Not letting my struggles, worries, or just life in general stop me from staying connected with those who are close to me. It is by staying connected, being able to vent a bit or talking about nothing child related that keeps me sane. 

So thank you!
Thank you to those of you who didn't let distance, time changes, or my lack of getting back to you stop our relationships from growing. 
Thank you for keeping me sane!


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